By Ronda Thorington, MA, LPC
The holidays are often pictured as joyful and peaceful with images of glowing lights, cozy mornings, and laughter around a table. But for many families, the season brings a different kind of challenge. Between unpredictable flares, travel worries, medical routines, and emotional exhaustion, “holiday stress” can feel like an understatement.
Last year, I had imagined a quiet post-Christmas day spent in pajamas, watching movies with my family. Instead, our home was hit with both COVID and norovirus, at the same time (what are the odds, right?!). My daughter, who is medically complex, became seriously ill. What followed was a blur of sleepless nights, doctor calls, and a visit to the emergency room. It wasn’t the holiday I had planned, but it taught me an important lesson: peace isn’t found in perfect plans; it’s created moment by moment, even when things go wrong.
Here are a few lessons I learned from that experience:
1. Celebrate Small Wins
When life feels unpredictable, notice what is working. Maybe your child ate breakfast, your family shared a laugh, or you managed a quick shower. These small victories matter. They remind us that progress, no matter how small, is still progress.
2. Keep Traditions, Even If You Adapt Them
Traditions give comfort and stability. When my daughter was too tired to join our family’s New Year’s toast, we brought the sparkling cider to her bedside instead. That small act reminded us that joy can exist in new forms.
3. Let Yourself Feel Everything
Guilt, worry, and disappointment are normal. You don’t have to push them away. Sometimes, giving yourself permission to cry, vent to a friend, or take a quiet moment can help those feelings move through you, instead of taking over.
4. Focus on What You Can Control
You can’t prevent every flare or illness, but you can control how you respond. Focus on comfort, connection, and the small things that bring peace. That mindset shift turns helplessness into Empowerment.
5. Prioritize Simple Self-Care
You know the saying; ‘you can’t pour from an empty cup’. Even five minutes of rest, a warm drink, or a short walk can help your body and mind reset. Ask for help when you need it. Your wellbeing matters too. Taking care of yourself is taking care of your loved one.
Finding Joy, One Moment at a Time
This holiday season, remember that joy doesn’t depend on everything going smoothly. It can be found in laughter during the craziest of moments (even during COVID and norovirus), quiet gratitude at bedtime, or the warmth of being together.
You deserve peace, even in the midst of the storm.
-November, 2025